


Macgyver Groupchat

by rhodestead



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:34:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28797705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhodestead/pseuds/rhodestead
Summary: If the Phoenix foundation had a groupchat...
Relationships: Jack Dalton/Matilda “Matty” Webber, Riley Davis & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016), Samantha Cage & Desiree "Desi" Nguyen, Wilt Bozer/Leanna Martin
Kudos: 11





	Macgyver Groupchat

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Med Groupchat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21416521) by [lesbianettes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianettes/pseuds/lesbianettes). 



> Each chapter is considered to be able to stand on its own

[Boz has renamed the chat “spies buddies”]

Matty: Do I need to remind you of the contract you signed or?

Boz: it’s… a joke? :)

Matty: So you think this is funny?

Boz: heum… no?

[Boz has renamed the chat to "funsies"]

Boz: … someone help?

Riley’s husband: I think she’s massing with you boz

Lesbian: boohoo cry

Boz: I hate all of you

Queen: boohoo cry

[Boz has left the chat]

[Boss Bitch has added “Boz” to the chat]

Boss Bitch: do I really have to do the police here?

Matty: At least it’ll give you a sense of purpose

Riley’s husband: shouts fired

Queen: damn

Boss Bitch: ruuuuude

Riley's husband: no one's gonna mention how boz's rename is worst or?

[Queen has renamed the chat "not spies"]

Matty: I work with children

Boz: yoooo while I have everyone’s attention

Lesbian: you do not

Boz: …

Boz: so I was planning leanna’s birthday party and I was wondering if y’all were good for the 12?

Riley’s husband: of course, Riley and I will be there!

Matty: I’ll have to check with James's sitter, but I’ll try and make it for you two.

Lesbian: can I bring my GIRLFRIEND

Queen: how’s james, matty?

Boz: we know you have a GIRLFRIEND des no need to put it in capital letter. And yes you can

Lesbian: AS SHE SHOULD

Boz: Matty you can also bring little jack if you want

Matty: he’s great, still hasn’t sink in that Jack won’t come home, but he’s strong.

Matty: He doesn't like big crowds, but thank you Bozer.

Queen: give him kisses from all of us <3

Matty: I will :)

Boz: Russ can I put you down or ?????

Boss bitch: sorry I was busy

Queen: do we really want him there tho?

Riley’s husband: riles be nice

Queen: I AM nice! otherwise why would you have married me

Lesbian: gross

Queen: that’s not what I mean

Queen: well.. maybe

Riley’s husband: BABE! This is a work groupchat

Boss bitch: well now you have my attention

[Lesbian has left the chat]

[Queen added “Lesbian” to the chat]

Lesbian: no straights allowed

Boz: this is heterophobia

Lesbian: shut up

[Lesbian added “wifey” to the chat]

Boss bitch: who’s wifey

Wifey: I really do not wish to be here

Lesbian: stay

[Queen has changed “wifey” username to “cage”]

Matty: welcome cage, we missed you.

Cage: missed you too Matty, my condolences for your loss.

Matty: thank you

Boz: So I’ll put everyone down for the party and if no one shows up and my girlfriend is sad then it’ll be all y’all’s fault

Riley’s husband: we’ll be there boz

Cage: who’s riley’s husband?

Queen: Mac

Cage: didn’t know you guys tied the knot!

Riley’s husband: we didn’t, she’s just pity

[Riley’s husband has left the chat]

Boz: ???

Queen: I kicked him, I will not tolerate this kind of negativity in my life

Lesbian: yas queeeeeen

[Matty has added “Riley’s husband” to the chat]

[Matty has changed “Riley’s husband” username to “blondie”]

Blondie: seriously matty? Was my name too long to type

Matty: sorry I sometimes forget your real name

Lesbian: lmao

Cage: well not much has changed since I left I see

Queen: I got married :)

Blondie: no you didn’t

Queen: OH DID I NOT ? I WONDER WHY

Blondie: please riles not here I won’t have that discussion with you again

Boss bitch: I smell commitment issues

Lesbian: that’s just you russ

Boz: oh shit

Cage: my GIRLFRIEND is awesome

Queen: so is mine uwu

Blondie: first of, I’m your boyfriend. Second, please don’t say uwu it makes me uncomfortable

Matty: I love you mac, but why would you say that…

Lesbian: uwu

Cage: uwu

Boz: uwu

Boss bitch : what in the bloody hell is that

Matty: some hot girl shit

Queen: MATTY ???

Matty: is it not ? I saw this on the internet

Lesbian: hot girl shit indeed matty, hot girl shit indeed

Cage: you’re hot girl shit

Blondie: can we not in the gc

Lesbian: someone’s uncomfortable

Queen: he always is it’s tiring…

Cage: someone needs some

Queen: well yeah

Boz: can we not

Lesbian: yo riles i'm out rn so let me grab something for you, i'll leave it in your locker

Cage: can i have one too?

Lesbian: I'M RIGHT THERE?

Cage: you're away a lot :(

Lesbian: -.-

Lesbian: FINE but only this one

Queen: can i have a black one

Cage: I WANT A PINK ONE

Boz: are we talking about what i think we're talking about

Matty: let them be, bozer

Boss Bitch: should i say something or?

Blondie: riley, in private please.

[Blondie has left the chat]

Boss bitch: someone’s uncomfortable AND mad

* * *

Mac: can we please not bring our problems in the gc…

Riles: c’mon mac, it was just fun and games everyone’s joking…

Mac: I know but you know why I don’t wanna have sex and having my friends joke about it just… makes me feel alienated and I don’t like it

Riles: I’m sorry babe, I won’t bring it up. I love you and we all love you.

Mac: love you too

* * *

Des: hey I hope I didn’t start anything between you and mac I didn’t mean to…

Davis: no no des, you’re fine. It just brought up some personal shit and I think it was just the last straw. It was bound to happen, don’t worry about it <3

Des: ok, let him know we love him

Davis: will do boo <3


End file.
